Let me preface everything by saying that medical school is my dream. And furthermore, it is a dream COME TRUE! (thanks mom, dad, and disney for being so integral in instilling that - 'Dream Big Girl! Chase those Dreams! It's Okay If You Have to Give Up Your Fins - like Ariel - Because Eventually You Get To Wear A Friggin Crown and Rule!' - mentality)
Now let me also add - sometimes dreams (I'm talking literal dreams now. stay with me.) are super amazing and you might wake up for half-a-second- and all you can think is "okay brain, I'm going to fall back asleep and you TOTALLY need to take me back into that dream cause it was awesome and I need to finish this one to completion! I can't get enough of this dream! A tip of the hat to you Shakespeare... 'sleep perchance to dream' indeed!" aaaaaand back into a sweet slumber you drift...
And then there are those unfortunate nights when you wake up with a violent body jerk. Lay there for a second staring at the wall or ceiling, or perhaps get up to wipe the sweat off , and the only thought coursing through your mind is "WHAT THE frack is WRONG WITH MY MIND!?!?!" Why would that be in there?! WHY!? I don't care how suppressed that story line was in my brain, that's just not right! Sure I know that neuroscientists basically agree dreams are just random firings of neurons... but seriously neurons.... No matter how random your firings are, that was messed up and you should be ashamed of your network of actionpotentials you just subjected me to. And then you might, in the heat of the moment, temporarily seriously consider seeking professional help because there is no way a mentally sane person could have a dream like that.
Well that is basic how I feel sometimes. It's a twisted friggin' rollercoaster. But totally the kind where I get off after the one ride, maybe stumble around for a couple steps until the endolymph in my semicircular canals (in the inner ear - look it up if you care) sorts it shit out, stand up and shout, 'that was AWESOME!' Then run back around to the entrance and do it all over again. And even though I'm just a teeny tiny baby in this journey through med school, I know myself well enough to know that no matter how loop-de-loopy it gets, I would never want to be on any other ride.
And with that... I have to go get working on todays lectures. As well prepare for anatomy lab demonstration this afternoon. On Monday my lab group and I dissected the: Abdominal Wall Viscera in situ. Which basically means we just cut through the belly and got to examine the liver, intestines, spleen, stomach, gall bladder... and this afternoon I go and demonstrate to those who didn't do that lab, all the little structures, functions, and clinical correlations we need to know about it all. It's kinda like a really messed-up, but way cooler, version of show-and-tell that we used to do in pre-school (although I clearly remember always being super cool, especially the time the piano bench fall on my toe, causing my big toenail to fall off, and bringing that sucker in to show my classmates. Obviously I was the coolest kid in the class and everybody wanted to be my best friend after that).
More to come... because there is almost always something amazing or totally ridiculous to tell you about!
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