Sometimes I'm Brilliant. Sometimes Not So Much.

Welcome back!  Wow.  It was quite the journey to get to this site.  What... a whirlwind.

In case you don't already know - since all this 'googling-slash-making-alias-creation' happened (I think it was last week? NO concept of time here) school has been on a whole new level of crazy.  Or so it seems.  We are now in final week of classes, and that also means wrapping up final anatomy lab dissections, lab demonstrations, PaCE sessions, Interdepartmental Clinical Cases, tutoring, etc etc.  All the while feeling like I am barely keeping myself from totally drowning under the actual-basic-studying that needs to get done.  Bottom line is that I have meant to write here.  But haven't. Whoopsies.

So quite literally the day after I wrote my last post (not the actual time stamp on it here) I'm talking with IslandBeib on skype.  Every once in a while (as in a lot) he sends me random youtube videos or links to just the randomest things ever mostly... and so on this particular day he's telling me how he has found out there are all these people out there with his same name.  Then sends me a link to a model's profile on this modelling agency site.  I'm all "well that's neat.  But how on earth did you find this? And WHY were you looking under models?"
He's like "my friend Harold found it."
So I'm not thinking and say "well have you at least found funny dirt on him?"
"No. I've been trying, but haven't yet.  But I will find dirt on you.  I'm gonna work my google-magic."

Stomach. Flip.

"Umm yeeeah.  Don't do that."

"Oh I think I have to now!"

"That's creepy stop it! Besides you won't find anything anyway because my real last name is not _____!!"

"Oh what? Really?"

"Yeah. It's _____."                   Sometimes my ability to lie on the spot comes in handy.

Then pause....

While I *knew* he was googling the fake last name I sent him.  I got onto my old blog in record time and shut-that-sucker-down!  As soon as I hit 'delete blog' he's all "did you buy chance live in Jacksonville, FL at some point?"

I'm all "maaaaybe.  I'm not at liberty to discuss it. I can't believe you googled me! Crossed the line dude. Crossed.  The.  Line.  For shame!"

Meanwhile my heart is still racing and now my brain is simply screaming CHANGE THE SUBJECT.


Crisis. Averted.

A couple days later.  Theodore sends me an email saying "would you mind stepping outside for a minute?"

Um. Okay?

So I get up and go outside.  He's not there.  So I go around the the back of the barn and he's still in his cubicle.  I go sit down beside him.  Smile.  "hey what's up."

"Hi.  Why would you say that about me?"  Shit serious face on.

"What do you mean? Why did I say what about you?"      I actually never thought he was referring to the blog because the guy doesn't even have facebook since he thinks it is a waste of time.  I *know* he wasn't going to go out searching for some stupidly ridiculous blog!

"Are you serious?"

"Um Yes! I *literally* have no idea what you are talking about right now. But, if you fill me in then perhaps we can figure it out."

"I can't believe you said that. I thought we were friends."

So now I'm just getting annoyed.

"Theodore.  I honestly am not at all following this right now."

"Well I guess they were lying."

"WHO was lying!?"

"Just kidding!"  Big Smile on his face.  "I made this treat for you!"  I look and see he made me this dessert thing he once told me about consisting of avocado, almonds, raisins... or something.

WHAT THE FRAGGLE ROCK JUST HAPPENED!?!?

"I made this for you!  I was just playing."

So I punched him and was all "why would you do that to me!"

He's giggling "I just wanted to see your reaction.  I know how sweet of a girl you are so I know that would confuse you."

Yes.  Yes I AM sweet.

"I hope you like the treat!"

Okay so I know some people might think 'oh that is too weird.  He must know something.'  And to you I say - no.  That is literally his off-beat-sense-of-humor.  Another example of this - the day before he did this to me, I walked into the barn at 645am and saw that there was some books and highlighters put down at the table at my chair.  Gertrude sometimes puts her stuff there (not so much because anyone will beat me to that spot.  But just out of sweet loyalty) so I look over at her and she's all "that's not mine!"

The day before there were these girls that seemed mad that they could not steal my chair.  So we both were like 'oh my gosh! They came in extra early and deliberately took that spot.'  I've only been sitting there every day for the past 80 days.  Whatever.  I'll just sit over here. See who it was.  Then kick their ass later.
Then Gertude, whispering even softer, "it was Theodore! Just pretend I didn't tell you and just move the stuff!'
Yes.  He was in there hiding in his cubicle watching my reaction.  Again I say, just his 'way'.  So I wasn't worried after this last 'joke'.

I got back to my seat and IslandBeibs could see me laughing - so he wants to know what it was about.  So I tell him (not so brilliant).  He's all "there's no way that is just his sense of humor.  He has something on you."
I'm all "are you kidding me! There is NOTHING! This is INSANE!  I barely talk to people to begin with here.  You think that's going to be my conversation starter?  Oh you know that guy Theodore!?! Well... let me tell you a thing-or-two-about him!   Yeah. No."

"Well maybe you wrote it.  Maybe you have a blog or something?"

"I don't have a blog.  What on earth would I write about!? And who on earth would care to read it! geeeez!"

"I dont know. Everyone has a blog.  I have a blog."            Perfect. Focus in on this and turn the attention the frack away from me.

"You have a blog!! I want to see!"

"No way"

"Fine. I can probably find it on my own."

So I go and send Harold a message - "what is Beib's blog? ps. sssshhhhh"

Then I had to go tutor.  A few hours later I am back. See message from Harold "here it is.  Don't tell him it was me who gave it to you."

So I sneakily read it. Fast.  The last post.... about me.  I. Die.

I read it so fast that it was really hard to actually make out if it was saying good things about me or bad things.  He does tend to have this odd way of saying things to me that leave me thinking "um riooght.  I'm not sure if that is a compliment or insult...."

More or less, his blog post about me was saying how it took him a month to work up the courage to talk to 'this girl' who he always sat behind in the barn.  "let's just call her "hottie with the body. HwtB."  (not lying).  And when he did she basically slapped him across the face!?  And she seemed to say "hahaha what are you going to do about it asshole!'
Um. What?

And then about how it's the island working against him because there's nothing to do here, but if this was back home it would *totally* be a different story because he would bring out all the stops on the best date.  Movie. Dinner.  Walk by the lake.  To his favorite spot overlooking the lake.
or something like that.  I got a little lost in the storm of confusion as I was speed-reading.

So naturally I panicked.  Harold was talking to me at the time, so I'm all "okay thanks for being super spy-like for me and getting that for me.  But I'm not going to read it.  It's really not my place."

Harold was like "wow. you are stronger that I am. I would read it."

"well I have a little thing called Self-Control.  Geez Harold."

"I know I need to work on that.  Well I'm going to read it.... Oh he totally wrote about you!  Oh he gave you a nickname!"

"oh geez.  Don't tell me. I don't want to know."

Stop judging me!!



I almost wish it all ended there and I didn't have anything left to tell you.  That's not the case.

more to come


xoxo